What are twin flames?
The term "twin flame" provokes a variety of responses in people, depending on their personal experiences. To us, it is a beautiful concept that we have become intimately familiar with since we met. Like many twin flames, we came across the phrase several days after meeting for the first time. It "happened" to show up in a link at the bottom of an article Aleks sent me.
I'm an avid reader of personal and spiritual development material, so it's always exciting to come across a term I haven't seen before. The novelty of it sparked my interest, so I clicked on it and felt a deep opening feeling as I read, recognizing it as describing the dynamic between us.
The way we felt when we met was like nothing either of us had ever experienced before. While we initially knew little about each other in a practical sense other than some striking parallels in our lives, we immediately felt as if we had known each other forever. The first time we saw each other, it was the cliché but real love at first sight. The discussion of biographical details that usually fills first-date conversations felt irrelevant. We naturally went straight into deep discussions about the nature of the soul, the meaning of synchronicities, and the purpose of life. Everything flowed.
But let's back up a little. To put it super simply, twin flames are kind of like soul mates on steroids. To give any credence to the concept, one must first believe in or be open to the concept of having a soul. And while soul mates often experience a smooth path together, twin flames’ respective life experiences will cause each other to see things in new ways. We see it as two souls who meet in order to catalyze each other's spiritual and psychological growth. Romance actually isn't the point of a twin flame journey. It is the cherry on the cake of the personal development you can choose to undertake.
Twin flames recognize each other at a soul level. Because of this, the wounds and coping mechanisms we've developed as a natural part of living as a human will feel dissonant between twin flames. These coping mechanisms may have gotten you through other relationships, but with your twin flame, you will begin to see that they are actually holding you back. Your souls vibe, but the unhealthy parts of your ego will not.
After an initial honeymoon period, the differences in the personas you have developed will begin to trigger each other. For example, if you developed an anxious attachment style due to your childhood, it's likely your "twin" will have developed an avoidant style from theirs.
The deep, soul-level attraction, and the desire to for your twin's highest good, will motivate you to do the work to face your deepest fears and shed your defence mechanisms, in order to become the person you've always dreamed of and had the potential to be.
This isn't an easy fairy tale though. Twin flames are often born into challenging circumstances and will have to break generational cycles or break away from societal limitations in order to heal their triggers so that they can be together. It's common to go through a dark night of the soul and need to make significant changes in your life to align with your higher self. Only when you have learned to love and care for yourself can you stay in sustained connection with your twin flame.